Select the best answer to the following question:

You know the team you root for sucks, when ...
A) Ryan Dempster is the opening day starter, mostly because Carlos Zambrano isn't around anymore.
B) One of the starting corner infielders had an OPS of .464 last season.
C) Alfonso "Can't hit 'em; Can't lay off 'em" Soriano is batting cleanup.
D) A pitcher the Pirates didn't bother re-signing is in the starting rotation.
E) All of the above.