Max wrote:

forsberg_us wrote:

If there's any indication a crime happened (battery, property damage, etc...) someone goes to jail regardless of whether the victim wants to prosecute.

FWIW, I know the wife better than I know him.  What I know of this is from her, as he is a quiet guy who never has a bad word to say about anything.  She's the one who says she did not ask for a restraining order and was very surprised when the result of her call to the police was that he was arrested, let alone the restraining order.

If he has any violent tendencies, they are well hidden and she is totally lying.

Id guess there is some lying going on.

"Police arrived, arrested husband, and judge slapped a restraining order on him against the wife's wishes . . . that her version."

I'm with AP. My first impression is the wife's account is untruthful, because I believe judges need to hear testimony from the victim to determine if the RO is warranted. Moreso if it's an ERO.
The episodes that always baffle me are the ones where the female partner calls the cops, the cops arrest the male partner, and then the female partner comes down and bails out the male partner.

artie_fufkin wrote:

"Police arrived, arrested husband, and judge slapped a restraining order on him against the wife's wishes . . . that her version."

I'm with AP. My first impression is the wife's account is untruthful, because I believe judges need to hear testimony from the victim to determine if the RO is warranted. Moreso if it's an ERO.
The episodes that always baffle me are the ones where the female partner calls the cops, the cops arrest the male partner, and then the female partner comes down and bails out the male partner.

Clearly untruthfull and likely shamefullness of their actions caused for a cover story.  I know cops.  They dont create unneeded work by arresting people they dont have to.  Then to think that happend and the Judge didnt see through it and issued a OP on her behalf is even more unlikely.

As to your second sentence; its bullshit and alot of wasted time on everyones part.  I would suggest to anyone who has boy to breif them at some point on the legal side of sexual conduct as well as domestic situations.  The feminist movement has yet to hit the "whos legally responsible" world.  The man more then ever has to cover his butt, needs to learn when to walk away and protect himself.  A crazy bitch can really ruin a guys life.  What Fors said about zero tolorance on domestics is true.  We have no disgression.  If we do nothing when signs of battery are there we stick our necks out there.

"A crazy bitch can really ruin a guys life."

I should suggest that to my wife as an epitaph for my mother-in-law's tombstone.

artie_fufkin wrote:

"A crazy bitch can really ruin a guys life."

I should suggest that to my wife as an epitaph for my mother-in-law's tombstone.

Im serious about having that talk with your son.  Here in Illinois one can come a registered sex offender if two high school students have sex.  One 17 or over and one under 17.  Basicly a senior having sex with anyone not in the senior class and even some that are is illegal by the letter of the law.  If the parents hate the kid enough and have enough suck to get the charges brought up the kid can really be snowballed.  I doubt alot of young men dont even know the risk they take.

APRTW wrote:

artie_fufkin wrote:

forsberg_us wrote:

"The episodes that always baffle me are the ones where the female partner calls the cops, the cops arrest the male partner, and then the female partner comes down and bails out the male partner."

It's called foreplay.

Rec

What sucks is when you are typing out a page long report on why you arrest the guys, taking pictures and conducting interviews knowing the whole time that she will be begging for the charges to be dropped in the morning.  I hate to say it but sometimes bad police work is good police work if you know what I mean.

Our process was like a bad assembly line of "justice."  Under Missouri law, you can hold someone without formal charges and without bond being set for up to 20 hours.  If we had a domestic where the victim didn't want to prosecute, we held the guy for 19 hours.  In the last hour, we'd fax a copy of the police report to the prosecutor's office, they would decline to issue formal charges, and the guy would be released at the 20 hour mark. 

Of course, if the situation was alcohol or drug induced, the 20 hour hold gave time for the irritant to wear off.

artie_fufkin wrote:

"Im serious about having that talk with your son."

He's still a couple of years away from that, but I'll keep it in mind, so thanks. I don't know how common this is elsewhere, but one of the differences between school then and now is the emergence of the guidance counselor. In my generation, the guidance counselor's role was to pretty much match you up with a college or a trade or whatever.
In my town, the kids start interacting with guidance counselors in the fourth grade, and their role pretty much runs the gamut from psychologist to sex ed teacher to substance awareness to life coach.

Id add school resource officer to that to.  Basicly a cop in the school.  From what I have seen of that they are just a dumping ground for admin to pass their problems to.  What once was handled in house is now made into a police matter.  The world is so screwed up now.  A kid at school this year got kickout of school for a while for having a hunting knife in his truck.  this is a farming/rural community.  I am not that old and I likely had knifes in my truck everyday and never thought anything of it.  It is like everyone is trying to make a rule to subsitute for good parenting.

APRTW wrote:

artie_fufkin wrote:

"A crazy bitch can really ruin a guys life."

I should suggest that to my wife as an epitaph for my mother-in-law's tombstone.

Im serious about having that talk with your son.  Here in Illinois one can come a registered sex offender if two high school students have sex.  One 17 or over and one under 17.  Basicly a senior having sex with anyone not in the senior class and even some that are is illegal by the letter of the law.  If the parents hate the kid enough and have enough suck to get the charges brought up the kid can really be snowballed.  I doubt alot of young men dont even know the risk they take.

It's amazing to me how things have changed.  Growing up in Illinois, the earliest kids started having sex in about 6th grade, and probably 10-20% were having orgasm-inducing sex of one kind or another by junior high.  Stats show that half of all American girls have lost their virginity before the age of 16 and for boys it's about 17.  I knew of multiple cases where high school girls, and in one case a boy, were having sex with teachers, janitors, or other adults.  Teachers would smoke pot with students, and the chief of police threw a beer bash for his high school aged daughter and her friends, a party that I attended so I know it to be fact: all of us were openly underage drinking . . . and driving.  And God, the number of times we all drove home absolutely shit-faced drunk.

Over-all, I am for the changes as regards drinking and driving, and for coming down on the sex between staff and students, but I think this stuff about criminalizing underage sex is pretty fucking short-sighted.

Last edited by Max (12/06/2011 11:40 am)

"Id add school resource officer to that to.  Basicly a cop in the school.  From what I have seen of that they are just a dumping ground for admin to pass their problems to."

The city I work in has an SRO program. The kids think the two SROs are a joke, but that's because of their personalities. One of the SROs is wimp who couldn't handle a beat, and the other got transferred from the drug unit after some malfeasance with some evidence. The drug unit busted a coke dealer, but the amount he was holding fell short of where a trafficking charge kicked in, so the detective added a couple of grams that was seized from another bust.
The whole case got chucked and the detective should have been canned, but it's almost impossible to fire anyone under civil service protection, so the chief stuck the detective behind a desk at the high school.

artie_fufkin wrote:

"Id add school resource officer to that to.  Basicly a cop in the school.  From what I have seen of that they are just a dumping ground for admin to pass their problems to."

The city I work in has an SRO program. The kids think the two SROs are a joke, but that's because of their personalities. One of the SROs is wimp who couldn't handle a beat, and the other got transferred from the drug unit after some malfeasance with some evidence. The drug unit busted a coke dealer, but the amount he was holding fell short of where a trafficking charge kicked in, so the detective added a couple of grams that was seized from another bust.
The whole case got chucked and the detective should have been canned, but it's almost impossible to fire anyone under civil service protection , so the chief stuck the detective behind a desk at the high school.

Please explain the bolded?

We had a pretty goo SRO when we had one.  He sucks as a cop in a really bad way but he tookth school thing serious.  I couldnt deal with that petty shit and act like I cared.  Plus like I said he was just the admin bitch for when tey didnt want to be the bad guys.  Budget cts cause hat position to go away and now we get to put up with him on he road again.

APRTW wrote:

artie_fufkin wrote:

"Id add school resource officer to that to.  Basicly a cop in the school.  From what I have seen of that they are just a dumping ground for admin to pass their problems to."

The city I work in has an SRO program. The kids think the two SROs are a joke, but that's because of their personalities. One of the SROs is wimp who couldn't handle a beat, and the other got transferred from the drug unit after some malfeasance with some evidence. The drug unit busted a coke dealer, but the amount he was holding fell short of where a trafficking charge kicked in, so the detective added a couple of grams that was seized from another bust.
The whole case got chucked and the detective should have been canned, but it's almost impossible to fire anyone under civil service protection , so the chief stuck the detective behind a desk at the high school.

Please explain the bolded?

We had a pretty goo SRO when we had one.  He sucks as a cop in a really bad way but he tookth school thing serious.  I couldnt deal with that petty shit and act like I cared.  Plus like I said he was just the admin bitch for when tey didnt want to be the bad guys.  Budget cts cause hat position to go away and now we get to put up with him on he road again.

I can't speak about Illinois, but Civil Service in Massachusetts is the equivalent of a lifetime contract. A few years ago, an off-duty cop - in his own personal vehicle with his wife in the passenger seat - initiated a pursuit of a drunk driving suspect. He called the station, and a cruiser responded. The cruiser eventually ended up against a tree. One of the cops in the cruiser nearly died, and the other one broke his leg in about six places. State Police investigated and found the off-duty cop was chiefly responsible for the crash - the drunk driving suspect was in fact not drunk but had just won a couple hundred bucks from the off-duty cop in an illegal poker game - and the chief of the local department reprimanded him. He wasn't fired. He wasn't suspended. A 1-page letter was placed in his file. The cop appealed to Civil Service, which overturned the chief's decision and forced him to remove the letter of reprimand from the cop's folder.
That's Civil Service in Massachusetts.

There is some questionable stuff that goes on at any job.  Like most jobs if you are not against inserting a mans penis into your throat you can get away with about anything.  For me I just keep my personal life clean, do what I am supposed to at work and when I dont agree with something let my feelings me known.  I guess if I screw up I will either have to find away around my gag reflex or take my lumps.  I think the latter is more applealing.  Police work is dod eat dog for sure.  Turn your back and its buddy fuck time.

Insults dont bug me.  I dont know how people do this job and maintain thin skin.