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12/12/2010 12:46 am  #1


The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

Seems like future failed GOP presidential nominee Rick Santorum is not telling anyone that he likes Starbucks:

He has already picked up some practical pointers. In New Hampshire, it's best to keep his Starbucks gold card in his wallet. In this state - where Dunkin' Donuts stores are as ubiquitous as Dairy Queens are in Iowa - people don't like to see their candidates drinking designer coffee.

For those in the Dunkin' Donuts set -- or for those who didn't realize this was a thing you could get -- a Starbucks Gold Card entitles the bearer to "the exclusive VIP treatment." According to the Starbucks website, it's granted, it seems, to customers who make "daily visits" to the store.

What do you get for all those elitist coffee drink purchases? A free drink on your birthday, 10% off "most purchases," special "offers and discounts," a first look at "new coffees and beverages" and, of course, the cachet that goes with knowing you've spent a ton of money on hot water that's been expertly pushed through dried up seeds that have been roasted and ground into a fine powder.

Apparently, if that that whole hot water pushing thing has happened at a Dunkin' Donuts, you're in the clear in the crucial early primary states, according to the Santorum school of presidential campaigning. If people were to find out that water was pushed through ground up seeds at a Starbucks, forget it. Maybe you can hold out for a spot in the next guy's cabinet, but you're through.

http://tpmdc.talkingpointsmemo.com/2010/12/populism-santorum-style-hide-the-starbucks-card.php

It's pretty funny. You'd have to be one giant retard to think less of a candidate because of where they get their coffee, but you just KNOW something stupid like this will come up in 2012. I remember listening to Rush/Hannity in 2004 and they were constantly berating John Kerry for looking like a French guy and wind sailing, proof that he wasn't a Real Murkan.

FWIW, I don't drink Starbucks, either. 1) The nearest Starbucks is 30 miles from my house and 2) I won't spend over a $1.20 for a cup of coffee. It's not a principle or anything; I just don't enjoy coffee enough to put down anything but five quarters for it.

 

12/12/2010 8:10 am  #2


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

tkihshbt wrote:

FWIW, I don't drink Starbucks, either. 1) The nearest Starbucks is 30 miles from my house and 2) I won't spend over a $1.20 for a cup of coffee. It's not a principle or anything; I just don't enjoy coffee enough to put down anything but five quarters for it.

Coffee makes life alot more enjoyable but I would never pay $5 for black coffee when I can make it in 3 minutes at home or go to work and drink it free.  Plus I drink a pot of the shit in the morning.  I would have to make a down payment on a pot of Starbucks coffee.  I am like you TK, the nearest one is 30 miles away.  I dont even know if it is still open.

I wouldnt think less of a guy for drinking starbucks coffee but I would think more of one if they walked into a gas station and bought it like everyone else.

 

12/12/2010 5:03 pm  #3


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

I guess I'm the wrong audience for this stuff. I don't drink coffee. We don't even have a coffee pot in the house. Starbucks wouild have gone broke a long time ago if it depended upon people like me.

 

12/12/2010 5:57 pm  #4


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

forsberg_us wrote:

I guess I'm the wrong audience for this stuff. I don't drink coffee. We don't even have a coffee pot in the house. Starbucks wouild have gone broke a long time ago if it depended upon people like me.

I drink it in the winter because otherwise I'll fall asleep at my desk. I used to drink about 44 ounces of soda, but it started showing up in my waistline.

     Thread Starter
 

12/12/2010 6:56 pm  #5


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

tkihshbt wrote:

forsberg_us wrote:

I guess I'm the wrong audience for this stuff. I don't drink coffee. We don't even have a coffee pot in the house. Starbucks wouild have gone broke a long time ago if it depended upon people like me.

I drink it in the winter because otherwise I'll fall asleep at my desk. I used to drink about 44 ounces of soda, but it started showing up in my waistline.

Been drinking diet soda for those reasons since about 1988.

Don't say it. You were drinking formula in 1988.

 

12/12/2010 8:08 pm  #6


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

forsberg_us wrote:

I guess I'm the wrong audience for this stuff. I don't drink coffee. We don't even have a coffee pot in the house. Starbucks wouild have gone broke a long time ago if it depended upon people like me.

While all of this rightfully seems silly, Santorum or any other political candidate who stumps in Cow Hampshire would be wise to heed the data within.
I'm like you. I don't get it either because I've had one cup of coffee in my life, and it was more than 20 years ago. My wife, on the other hand, acts like someone is trying to cross the bridge under which she lives until she has her first cup of Dunkin' Donuts coffee. And it has to be from Dunks. You can buy a bag of DD coffee in any supermarket around here, but it's apparently not the same as it is when it's poured into a styrofoam cup by an 19-year-old college dropout wearing a pink and orange hat.

 

12/12/2010 9:00 pm  #7


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

tkihshbt wrote:

* * * FWIW, I don't drink Starbucks, either. 1) The nearest Starbucks is 30 miles from my house and 2) I won't spend over a $1.20 for a cup of coffee. It's not a principle or anything; I just don't enjoy coffee enough to put down anything but five quarters for it.

TK,

I have always been shitty at arithmetic and my logic has started to fail me.  But there seems to me to be a problem with you just laid down as your non-principle.

 

12/12/2010 9:23 pm  #8


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

Mags wrote:

tkihshbt wrote:

* * * FWIW, I don't drink Starbucks, either. 1) The nearest Starbucks is 30 miles from my house and 2) I won't spend over a $1.20 for a cup of coffee. It's not a principle or anything; I just don't enjoy coffee enough to put down anything but five quarters for it.

TK,

I have always been shitty at arithmetic and my logic has started to fail me.  But there seems to me to be a problem with you just laid down as your non-principle.

I just give them $1.25 and get the nickel back.

     Thread Starter
 

12/12/2010 9:27 pm  #9


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

tkihshbt wrote:

Mags wrote:

tkihshbt wrote:

* * * FWIW, I don't drink Starbucks, either. 1) The nearest Starbucks is 30 miles from my house and 2) I won't spend over a $1.20 for a cup of coffee. It's not a principle or anything; I just don't enjoy coffee enough to put down anything but five quarters for it.

TK,

I have always been shitty at arithmetic and my logic has started to fail me.  But there seems to me to be a problem with you just laid down as your non-principle.

I just give them $1.25 and get the nickel back.

Thank Goodness.  I thought I was worse off than I am.

I've never had a cup of Starbucks so far as I can recall and I hate the coffee you get at gas stations and fast food places.  Unfortunately, I have to drink a lot of the latter when I'm driving any distance.

 

12/12/2010 10:31 pm  #10


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

It's pretty non-descript. The specialty coffees are just loaded with caramel, sugar or chocolate.

     Thread Starter
 

12/12/2010 11:16 pm  #11


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

artie_fufkin wrote:

forsberg_us wrote:

I guess I'm the wrong audience for this stuff. I don't drink coffee. We don't even have a coffee pot in the house. Starbucks wouild have gone broke a long time ago if it depended upon people like me.

While all of this rightfully seems silly, Santorum or any other political candidate who stumps in Cow Hampshire would be wise to heed the data within.
I'm like you. I don't get it either because I've had one cup of coffee in my life, and it was more than 20 years ago. My wife, on the other hand, acts like someone is trying to cross the bridge under which she lives until she has her first cup of Dunkin' Donuts coffee. And it has to be from Dunks. You can buy a bag of DD coffee in any supermarket around here, but it's apparently not the same as it is when it's poured into a styrofoam cup by an 19-year-old college dropout wearing a pink and orange hat.

It is like every other bad habit in life, everyone else drinks it so you drink it.  You dont really think that much of it but over time you start to like it.  Then you wake up one day and fine that you look forward to the first cup of coffee.  Who really like beer when you are 13 and sneak a few out of the frig.  It is kind of like that. 

And I believe a cup of black coffee ( the way a real man drink it) has 5 calories in it.

 

12/13/2010 9:23 am  #12


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

"Who really like beer when you are 13 and sneak a few out of the frig."

I didn't drink beer until I was 16. It was my junior year of high school and we celebrated clinching a berth in the state basketball tournament by splitting a case of Miller High Life. I'm taking about the entire team, except for the point guard and the starting center who were "my-body-is-a-temple" types. Which is probably why they both went on to play basketball in college and the rest of us ended up in the Thursday Night Bricklayers League.

 

12/13/2010 4:24 pm  #13


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

artie_fufkin wrote:

"Who really like beer when you are 13 and sneak a few out of the frig."

I didn't drink beer until I was 16. It was my junior year of high school and we celebrated clinching a berth in the state basketball tournament by splitting a case of Miller High Life. I'm taking about the entire team, except for the point guard and the starting center who were "my-body-is-a-temple" types. Which is probably why they both went on to play basketball in college and the rest of us ended up in the Thursday Night Bricklayers League.

And you were disappointed that beer didnt really live up to the expectations you set for it, right?  Now you find beer to be a wonderfull thing.  Of course you were luck enough to be to young and dumb to know that half the problem was that you were drink a Miller product.

Last edited by APRTW (12/13/2010 4:28 pm)

 

12/13/2010 5:38 pm  #14


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

APRTW wrote:

artie_fufkin wrote:

"Who really like beer when you are 13 and sneak a few out of the frig."

I didn't drink beer until I was 16. It was my junior year of high school and we celebrated clinching a berth in the state basketball tournament by splitting a case of Miller High Life. I'm taking about the entire team, except for the point guard and the starting center who were "my-body-is-a-temple" types. Which is probably why they both went on to play basketball in college and the rest of us ended up in the Thursday Night Bricklayers League.

And you were disappointed that beer didnt really live up to the expectations you set for it, right?  Now you find beer to be a wonderfull thing.  Of course you were luck enough to be to young and dumb to know that half the problem was that you were drink a Miller product.

Beer And Me:

I've often heard friends say that they didn't like beer when they first tasted it.  For me it was love at first sip, and I think the first sip may very well have been Busch Bavarian the year it was introduced.  Dad usually drank the cheapest he could get and really loved the stuff, too much.  When I first started listening to baseball with him (about the 6th or 7th grade), he offered me a sip of beer and I took one and loved it.  After that, I learned that I could get a similar taste with baseball card bubble gum and a couple of swallows of coke right on top of a fresh chew.  Dad had always told me that he hoped I wouldn't drink or smoke but that I should be open with him about it if I did and that he would prefer that I drink only around him.  I never drank more than a couple of swallows at any one time and I gave it up completely by the time I was around 14 because I thought it would stunt my growth.  From then until I finished football season my senior year, I never drank liquor of any kind or smoked.  Unlike Artie's teammates, it didn't help me.  I still wasn't for shit as an athlete in High School.

When I began college teaching, I finally felt financially able to indulge myself and drank beer heavily for about 15 years.  But I've never drunk much at home except when friends have been over watching football or shooting the bull with me.  When I'm by myself, I drink so fast that I'm unable to stay awake past the 5th or 6th inning and I eat way too much.

I do think there is a genetic predisposition to like beer.  Not only did my dad drink it almost non-stop on weekends when football and basketball season were over, but my little brother learned by the time he was about three, maybe younger, to check out cans that Dad had left sitting around with two or three swallows in them.  Little Brother would walk around with the can straight up until he could be sure he had drained every drop.

 

12/13/2010 8:26 pm  #15


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

APRTW wrote:

artie_fufkin wrote:

"Who really like beer when you are 13 and sneak a few out of the frig."

I didn't drink beer until I was 16. It was my junior year of high school and we celebrated clinching a berth in the state basketball tournament by splitting a case of Miller High Life. I'm taking about the entire team, except for the point guard and the starting center who were "my-body-is-a-temple" types. Which is probably why they both went on to play basketball in college and the rest of us ended up in the Thursday Night Bricklayers League.

And you were disappointed that beer didnt really live up to the expectations you set for it, right?  Now you find beer to be a wonderfull thing.  Of course you were luck enough to be to young and dumb to know that half the problem was that you were drink a Miller product.

"And you were disappointed that beer didnt really live up to the expectations you set for it, right?"

Not at all. It was cold, quenched my thirst when I was thirsty and took the edge off. My wife jokes that I'm a much more relaxed and almost pleasant to be around (I said almost) when I have a 2-beer buzz. What I've never been able to drink is hard liquor. Vodka makes me puke, tequila makes me do stupid things, and whiskey makes me gag. And the only time I drank rum, I ended up snorting nutmeg. Don't ask.

 

12/13/2010 8:49 pm  #16


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

If I am just being social beer will do the trick but if I really want to tie one on I have begun to find out whiskey is quicker and better.  If that is my goal I really dont want to spend 5hrs drinking 15 beers and pissing every 10 minutes.

 

12/13/2010 9:10 pm  #17


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

"I do think there is a genetic predisposition to like beer."

I come from a long line of alcoholics on my mother's side. At my grandmother's funeral last summer, my mom's brother tried to hit on my dad's sister. Dad was pissed. And his side of the family, who think a second glass of white wine with dinner is extravagant, were mortified.
My grandmother used to drink Ballantine Ale. Whenever I visited her during the summer, she'd make me breakfast. I'd be eating Corn Flakes or whatever with a glass of apple juice while she drained a glass of beer. She was such a good customer the liquor store used to deliver her those green GIQ bottles by the case. One day, my cousin opened the door to her fridge and exclaimed "It looks like Emerald City!"

 

12/13/2010 9:15 pm  #18


Re: The Elitist Guide to Drinking Coffee

APRTW wrote:

If I am just being social beer will do the trick but if I really want to tie one on I have begun to find out whiskey is quicker and better.  If that is my goal I really dont want to spend 5hrs drinking 15 beers and pissing every 10 minutes.

I could have turned pro in college, but the days of me being able to drink more than a 6-pack in one night are pretty much over. And I tend to have to make brand choices depending upon how my body reacts. If I drink any Coors or Sam Adams product, I wake up with a headache the next day. And Bud products are like Drano.

 

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